Integral Borderline

Here's a quote:

"...a rich and fruitful topic for further elaborations - the reconceptualization of psychopathology within an AQAL matrix of indigenous perspectives. "

Excerpt C: The Ways We Are In This Together: Intersubjectivity and Interobjectivity in the Holonic Kosmos

Uh, yeah.  So let's get on!

Only last week did I find out what Ken's idea is about BPD.  Where the hell have I been?  As it turns out, he believes in a kind of lack of boundary between the self and not-self.  An actual or partial lack of unconscious.  This is a tidy predicament.  All perspectives, all the time, no buffer.  Get gestated, get born, GO! 

Zero protection from the world of contentious perspectives starting before one is even verbal. 

The result is a rotating cycle of repress and project and split and break.  Like torturing someone to death, resuscitating them and then doing it sommore.  Yeah.  That sums it up. 

So, I'm kinda manic right now.  I don't really know why.  But I'm going with it.  I tend to want to make grand decisions when I feel like this, but I'm starting to wake up to that not being a good thing.  So, I think I can contain that impulse.  But in place of decisions, I think I'll just make a grand fantasy instead. 

I want to be one of the first Clients to develop Integral Peer-support and Recovery Structures.  I think I can do that.  LOL  Okay, I'll stop short of saying I will do that.  But only just!   I envision a web of Nut-house Salons around the country, linked via the Internet.  I know I'm not the only Client interested in Integral!!  LOL  Oh, the irony dripping off that sentence!  I suspect many integralers are some of the most insidiously insane people on the planet.  Like many artists.  We are pointedly driven and conspicuously pruned to grow into a certain shape and crevice.  Why the hell would people want to develop this way?  It hurts!!  Jesus!  But hurts more, bothers less.  Eventually.

I was commenting on a blog the other day and started thinking about whether Borderline is a sort of evolutionary mutation.  Like Asperger's is often thought of.  What if human beings begin to simply not develop an unconscious?  Like a tail.  What if we lose it because our balance is contained by some other unforeseen adaptation?  Like a Manx cat hops with it's hind legs almost bunny-like to maintain the sense of balance.  What if that were to start happening on a large scale so that people would HAVE TO learn to parent better and be more responsible for the protection and care of young. 

In the past, evolution favored mutating away from vulnerability.  The law of the jungle required that.  But we have a different law now.  What does this new law require?  What if vulnerability went with increased sensitivity and awareness because the new law required that?  We're gonna get mashed up in the machine for a while until...   what?  Critical mass?  Like Ghandi's law?  Enough bodies pile up and finally the world's attention is drawn to the Brutality rather than the Glory and Order. 

Isn't this exactly what Hitler wanted to regress back away from?  The tolerance of vulnerability?  He favored the Law of the Jungle so as to strengthen the human race again because our progress was being slowed down by the weak.  Why else would that be a bad thing unless the weak had some hidden gift to give - besides the opportunity for the rest of us to be slowed down by them?

How's that for a reconceptualization?

Midnight, full-moon, pre-menstrual thoughts.